Scientists invent skin- prodding laser device to tell you when you’ll die. Thanks, science.


People may often tell you to live as
if you’ll die tomorrow, but that
only makes sense if you are
actually diagnosed with terminal
illness and decide to quit your job
to enjoy some last moments on
earth. For everyone else, this
concept just attempts to glorify
YOLOing recklessly or justify that
one night stand with the waitress
from Hooter’s. No! Not okay!
Unless you have a definite
estimate on how much time you
have left in life, there’s no reason
to behave dangerously. To get that
estimate, however, you might need
to wear one of these “death test”
watches to predict when you’re
going to kick the bucket.
Created by physics
professors Aneta Stefanovska and
Peter McClintock from Lancaster
University in England,
the Endotheliometer is a watch-
like device that can administer
these so-called death tests .
Using laser technology to evaluate
your health conditions, the watch
sends beams deep into the
wearer’s skin to analyze tiny cells
inside the capillaries and
determine how the body is aging.
“Everything that goes on in your
cardiovascular system, whether you
are going to have a stroke or heart
attack, starts off as something
going wrong in the
endothelium,” Stefanovska said. By
testing the tissue under the skin,
doctors will be able to see early
signs of diseases, such as cancer,
coronary heart disease, or
dementia. Using the data gathered
from these laser beams, cell
functions are rated between 0 to
100 based on optimal levels. This
number is then used to calculate
the person’s remaining life span.
“I’m hoping we will build a
database that will become larger
and larger, so every person
measured can be compared against
it,” Stefanovska said . “We will then
be in a position to tell them the
values [that] predict a certain
number of years.”
The prototype is currently
described as “bulky and
experimental,” but the team says
they are working to miniaturize the
size to that of a wristwatch. They
estimate the device to cost
between £200 to £300
(approximately $310 to $464), and
hope to have the product ready for
market in the next three
years. Just don’t die before then if
you want to keep living on the
edge, and maybe cut back on a few
fried Oreos.

posted by janjaweed!


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